kiah

Shortly after his third birthday, my son woke up one morning and asked for a dog. He explained ever so sweetly that he, in fact, needed one. I explained to him equally sweetly that I had a three year old, an eleven month old and a husband who was never home and it would take more than a sloppy kiss for me to let another living thing that needed caring for into our home. Being the intelligent lad that he is, he went straight to “break her down” guerilla-esque tactics that he was sure would force me to change my mind. Every morning for over a YEAR he would run into our room and ask expectantly, “Is today the day? Is this the day you are going to buy me a dog?”. It felt like a cheesy Friday night sitcom!

About 6 months into this little routine a new couple moved in next door. They brought with them a sweet little baby girl and a georgeous Nova Scotian Duck Toller. N immediately fell in love with the dog. He would play out in the yard for hours with him or hang around the window waiting until he came outside. N would throw a ball over our fence into their yard. The dog would get the ball, climb onto their deck and then drop it over the fence so N could throw it back. After a while, cute poochy figured out how to get into our yard by crawl under the fence. This lead to hours of fun throwing balls and chasing each other. Even I, the unsympathetic mother who didn’t want to have to clean up after or feed another mammal could see that our boy did indeed need a dog. He was meant to have a dog and I would see to it that he would get his puppy!

Unbeknownst to our son, we began to research breeds. T and I wanted a larger dog. We needed a dog that was smart (read: easy to train), good with kids, mild mannered and didn’t shed since I am super allergic to dogs! We also didn’t want an ugly dog so that ruled out most of the hypoallergenic ones. Finally, we came upon the Labradoodle. A brilliant mix with a ridiculous name (my husband prefers to call it the Pootriever… much better, no?). One night I came across a breeder who had a beautiful puppy for sale. One look at her and I knew that she was our dog. Within a week we had her in our home. We officially named her Kiah, an Australian Aboriginal word meaning “from the beautiful place”.

Having a puppy has been everything I anticipated. Wonderful, chatic, messy, frustrating… We’ve had her for nearly 5 months now. Our kids just love her. They wrestle with her. Feed her waaaaaaay too many treats. Drop food at meals so she can eat the stuff they don’t want. The other day I found N and Kiah huddled together in Kiah’s kennel. N had a bowl of peanut butter and was feeding it to Kiah off his fingers. Too cute!

The one thing that drives me really crazy about this dog is her fetish with eating disgusting, sorid items. She has a serious love for garbage, dirty socks and poopy diapers. I can’t tell you how many times I have found her hidden in the corner of the yard chowing down on poop and diaper gel. There is a reason we call her Shit Face! The fact that I run a day home only serves to fuel her addiction. You might wonder about loving a furry beast who hungers for fecal matter. So do I. Never the less, love her we do. I just keep the diapers locked up and a supply of vinegar on hand in case she gets one.

Having a dog who eats so much yuck, leads to some interesting finds when we are cleaning up her poop in the yard. I’ve found tinfoil, paper towel, bits of lego and Little People dolls, to name a few things mixed with her, um, refuse. Usually I roll my eyes and wonder how on earth she got a hold of said item. Same as I used to do when I found sparkly stickers in my daughter’s diapers. A couple of weeks ago I was cleaning up the yard and I nearly died when I came across one pile of delight. Imagine my shock when I found a condom in her pooh! Yes, my dog ate a CONDOM. The super crazy thing is there is no way it came from this house. Not possible. Kind of makes you wonder? We are never going to the park again.

You may go throw up now!

test Filed under Family |