this one’s for Phil

For the love! Does it ever end? Ever? As if we don’t have enough chaos in our lives with the move, the baby, the new job, the blah, blah, blah. Now G has turned into SUPERFREAK! She has taken me to the edge of my sanity and is doing her very best to kick me over it into the abyss of super-crazy-psycho-Mom.

The girl turned 3 in April so there is the expected three year old behaviour issues. You know, independence, defiance that sort of thing. This cute little blonde haired beauty of ours has gone all Emmeril on us and “kicked it up a notch”! Everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING is a fight these days. From what cereal she wants for breakfast (and you can bet I’ll get it wrong) to what panties she will wear (Dora, no hello kitty, no orange Dora) to the angle her barrettes are placed in her hair. It is exhausting trying to get though a day without losing my cool. Casual, fun days are a thing of the past around here. I feel so sorry for N having to put up with all of this.

Every morning G has the craziest meltdown when T goes to work. We have tried to develop a routine for them but it’s not helping. Once he makes for the door (after having given her about 30 hugs, assurances of his love and promises to return), G starts to get a desperate tone in her voice. She starts yelling, “I love you Daddy, I love you DaddyI love you DaddyI love you DaddyI love you Daddy!” over and over. She flings herself at him and begs for another huggie, one more kiss, a high fives, please don’t go, don’t leave me with Mommy, no Daddy no, please another huggie DADDY! If I don’t catch her in time she will run out the door and throw herself at his car yelling, “I love you Daddy. Have a good day at works. Don’t go. I love you!”. It’s a fairly pathetic and desperate scene. Especially since she replays it morning after morning. On really good days she takes off after him when he drives away and runs as fast as she can after his car. I love being the neighbourhood spectical those mornings. I can just imagine what our neighbours must think as they watch me running braless in illfitting pj’s at 7 months gestation up the street after my shrieking child. The only thing better than me running like a manic up the street is the struggle that insues as I try to drag G back to the house. I’m not supposed to lift anything heavy (HA!) so it’s really fun trying to get her home and into the house. Imagine the smile that is nailed to my face!

Last night she woke up around 4:30 and decided that she wanted to play! I went into her room to put her back to bed and she had a temper tantrum! How am I supposed to be all patient and modern Mommy when my daughter is snapping because I won’t play with her in the middle of the freaking night? She won’t lie down. She won’t put her covers on. Which wouldn’t be an issue if she would wear warmer pj’s and socks to bed. But NO! If we put her in something that will actually keep her warm and asleep all night she waits until we go downstairs and changes into something designed for hot August nights.

I am trying to be patient. I am doing my VERY BEST to be consistant and loving but firm. I’ve cut her slack because I know her little world is upside down and she doesn’t understand why everything keeps disapearing into boxes. But there is a limit. I don’t know what else I can do. We’ve hugged, given time outs, ignored, yelled, taken favourite items away, shut her in her room, given her more one-on-one time, stood on our heads and danced (and trust me, that is not a sight anyone wants to see right now!)… Dudes, nothing is working. I’m thinking of sending her to the Dr. Phil house for a week or two!

Tell me it’s a phase. Tell me it will pass and that she won’t still be like this once the baby is born. Tell me anything except that it will always be like this cause I suck at parenting.

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