This afternoon I met my running group at 4:00 for our usual Sunday afternoon run. I had with me my usual gear: shoes, tights, water, wicking shirt… everything I needed to make my run more comfortable. Unlike most of my other runs, I decided not to bring something with me this afternoon. Something I’ve hauled with me like a heavy weight on each of my other runs. Today I made the choice to leave my fears behind. I decided not to be afraid of how my run would go, whether I would be able to keep up and if I made better time than last week.

I got out of my car at our meeting spot, stretched and then just ran. Today I WENT FOR IT. No over thinking. No self-doubts. No comparisons. I trusted myself. Know what? I had my best run ever. There were moments that I didn’t look very graceful, times when my breathing was loud and laboured, times when I had to say out loud, “I CAN do this” and will myself to go another 3 minutes. It probably didn’t look all that pretty but I DID IT! I ran a steady 10/1 pattern for 7K. Along the way my friend told me that she was proud of me. I felt that and it strengthened me. I felt proud of myself too.

Today I learned to trust myself a little more. To not be afraid of what’s to come or feel burdened by the weight of the past. I learned to lean on my community when I couldn’t do it on my own. To trust that God would give me the strength to fulfill my goals. Today I learned a little bit more what it feels like to step out in faith, to not be hampered by fears, to take a risk and trust that it will be ok. I got a picture of what it feels like to take the ceiling off of my dreams and live them rather than allowing them only to swim in my head. I got a taste of the freedom that comes from risking and knowing that I can do it.

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