nose

Oh my goodness! Has it really been nearly a week since I posted? I wasn’t kidding when I said we have been busy!

Instead of boring you with tales of our crazy schedule, let me tell you about my youngest child.

This morning he saddled up to his Daddy and whispered that his Cheerio was all gone. He said it was in fact, all gone UP ‘DAIR and vaguely pointed into the sky with an impish grin.

Up there where, little man?

In your nose? Show Daddy where you put the Cheerio.

This is when a somewhat frantic search ensued for the missing Cheerio and then for a flashlight to try to see the missing Cheerio. This is also when my help was enlisted.

We could not see the Cheerio but when we got close, we could smell it! Even so, I decided that it wasn’t that big of a deal since it would probably disintegrate and come out in the next day or two (and really, even if I took him to the doctor, how would she extract a soggy Cheerio from his nose?) and we didn’t know FOR SURE that he put it up there. OH, BROTHER! It’s a darn good thing that kid is so CUTE!

Thanks for keeping life interesting. We love you!

whisper

My little guy and I have a game we like to play. He climbs up in my laps and says, “whisper Mommy” and then turns one of his cute little ears towards me. I whisper, “I love you” into his ear and then he whips his head to the other side so he can offer me his other ear. This will usually go on and on until he is in fits of laughter. We were playing our little game the other night. I was telling him how much I love him, how proud I am of him, how smart and funny and amazing he is. After a few minutes he put both hands on either side of my face, looked directly into my eyes and leaned in close. I started tearing up at the sweetness of the moment. Then he turned my face so he could whisper in my ear and said, “I has gummy bear?”.

Ahhhh, children!

sometimes

Sometimes you have to laugh or you’ll break down and cry. Today is one of those days.

At least one person in our house has been sick (and not just a little bit sick) everyday for the last 12 days running. It started with our oldest suddenly spiking a fever and doubling over in pain from his aching head. Then our youngest overlapped, followed quickly by their sister and Mr. T. High fevers that raged for days, binding headaches, sore throats, racking cough. It would seem (and the doctors agree) that our family got THAT flu. You know the one I’m talking about. Super.

At the height of it all last week, our pediatrician called to let us know that the kids had pinworms (sorry you had to read that, Grandma). As if I wasn’t busy enough, I now had to bleach the bathrooms, the bedding and probably the kids (kidding about that last bit!). I hauled them all into the doctor’s office Monday to get prescriptions and have them weighed. And NO, I couldn’t just weigh them myself at home. They HAD to all come to the office. While we were there she checked them all over, at my request (I was so not leaving that office without making darn sure I wouldn’t be on the phone with them the next day begging for an appointment). One was fine, one had fluid in her ears but it was likely just from her stuffy nose and the littlest one had an ear infection plus chest infection. MORE antibiotics. We packed up and stopped in at the nearest drugstore where I discovered that the medicine she had “prescribed” (the one we all had to come into the office to get a prescription for) was an over the counter remedy that was on back order and unavailable. As in no one in the entire city had any. While the pharmacist told me that I wouldn’t be able to treat the kids and that he had no idea how I’d get the medicine or get rid of the pinworms, he waved a box around as he spoke. I notice a cartoon picture of a worm with a slash mark in it. Struggling to maintain my composure after having wasted so much time already that day and trying to hold my now screaming two year old at the front of a rapidly lengthening line, I politely asked what the box of medicine he was holding was for.
Oh, it’s for pinworms.
And is there any reason why I couldn’t buy that box of medicine for my children?
Well it’s pills and the doctor wants you to have liquid.
But there isn’t any liquid available anywhere.
Nope. Just the pills.
Is it the correct dose?
Yes. But it’s pills.
What if I were to grind it up in my mortar and pestal and give it to them in some jam?
Well, now! That would work. And then you’d be able to treat them after all. Pesky thing, those pinworms.
And then I said nothing because I really just wanted to punch someone in the teeth.

Fast forward to this morning. I was awoken at 6am by my daughter clutching my arm whining that her ear huuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrt (you might remember her as the one with fluid behind her ears that was just build up from her stuffy nose). I was so tired that all I could say was, darling husband, it’s your morning to get up with the kids. Deal with this. And then I went back to sleep.

When I got up, we packed the two oldest off to school (forgetting about the ear ache because it hadn’t been mentioned again) and I took our youngest to swimming lessons. When I pulled into the garage, Mr. T flung open the door to the house and informed me that he had just returned home with our daughter who was now weeping on the couch because her ear hurt so badly she couldn’t stay at school and she ended up missing her class costume party. The party I specially made gluten/dairy free sugar cookies for. And iced them with orange icing because that was what she really wanted. And I wanted her to feel normal at school instead of always being the kid who can’t eat the treat so I made them, even though I didn’t have the time or the energy. Now she is sleeping (thank you inventors of Advil and Tylenol) and I am sitting (on a towel because someone peed on the couch today) here laughing at how ridiculously silly my life is sometimes.

On days like today I like to drag my little point and shoot around with me. Looking at the images from my day helps me to see the humour in them or to find the tender moments to store in my heart. Here are some of today’s shots.

My sick little girl. Now who wouldn’t feel sorry for her?

This is what I did for most of the afternoon- snuggled Mr. Grumpy and his sleeping sister.

Me laughing because there is pee on my couch and laundry falling on my head. Someone really should deal with all that.

Snuggling with my ugly shoes, of course. Is that not the first thing you think of when seeking comfort?

Dear Children,

Please get better so I can finish all of the projects I have on the go.

Love, Mom

Lunch! Food makes him scream. Cookies do not. My head was hurting. Call me weak. I don’t mind. Really. Besides, someone needed to eat all those cookies.

See? The screaming, it’s painful.

Much better, don’t you think?

Going back to the doctor tomorrow. Bringing the receptionist cookies (real ones) because she always fits me in.

meat

Today was a COLOSSALLY bad day. So bad that my husband found two of the kids and I sitting in a tangled heap of arms and legs BAWLING our eyes out at 5pm. One of them was coughing, sneezing and dripping snot with a double ear infection (and was puking with a fever yesterday) and the other was burning up with fever, screaming because she “gotsd the flu and the headache”. I was crying because, well, that’s what I do when I am exhausted, overwhelmed and have been covered in barf, snot and diarrhea for the last few days. FUN TIMES!

Our oldest was also home from school today. He’s got a cold and I didn’t want to inflict his germy spray on his classmates. Since all of the kids were sick, I let them watch A LOT of tv today. The BEST part of my whole day came when the kids were watching Little Bear. Tuck got a funny look on his face while he was watching Little Bear dance around with all of his friends and then blurted out, “Little Bear’s friends are all meat. It must be weird to want to eat your friends!”. That little gem has kept me laughing through MOST of the day.

fyi to the grandparents

The other day I overheard our two oldest kids having a conversation about a very, very old person. It went something like this:

G: But he was so old.
N: How old?
G: Weally, weally old.
N: Like a hundred?
G: No! Sixty-one-hundred old (side note: her life is brought to you by the number 6100. Pick a number between one and ten…6100! How many cookies do you want? 6100. And so on…).
N: He can’t be that old. It’s impossible!
G: Why?
N: Because once you are 61, you die.
Me: Ummmm, all of your grandparents are about that old.
N: Well, I guess they don’t have much time left!

dinner conversation

This conversation took place over bbq’d chicken last night.

N: This chicken is really good!
Me: I’m glad you are enjoying it.
N: I wonder what it is?
Me: It’s chicken.
N: Yeah but what kind of chicken?
Me: Chicken, chicken.
N: What I really want to know is if this is a battery chicken or what?
Me: stunned silence…

note to self

Two nights ago as I was climbing into bed, I discovered a pool of chocolate between the sheets. Upon investigation, it seems that two of our children (who will continue to remain nameless!) hid several Easter eggs in our bed on Sunday afternoon as part of an impromptu egg hunt. I guess that explains why my pj’s were covered in melted chocolate when I changed on Monday. How I made it almost to noon without noticing that I had chocolate all over my left hip is a sad commentary on the current state of my appearance.

Note to self: Look in mirror occasionally.

word play

This morning we put up an entire solar system in my son’s bedroom. As we were attaching the planets to the ceiling, he noticed that there were only 8 planets in the pile and cried, “Oh no! Mom, Uranus is missing!”. I nearly died of laughter and he still can’t figure out why!

tip

When your almost 6 year old can’t for the life of him remember what word b-u-m-p spells and that particular word appears about 40 billion times in the book he is trying to read, just point out that b-u-m spells one of the best words going… BUM… and then all you need to do is add the “p” and you’ve got a boy who will never EVER forget what B-U-M-p spells! Be prepared to endure a lot of silly giggling and much repeating of the word “bum” while falling back onto his pillow gasping for air. You’re heart might even melt a bit when after the hilarious laughing simmers down to the occasional chortle, he looks at you and says, “You are the best Mom ever. Hahahahahaha… bum!”.

butt end

On the drive home from school today:

Me: How was school today?
N: Fartariffic!
Me: So it was a good day then?
N: Buttastic. Buttariffic. Bumidybumidybumbumbum.
Me: Mmmmmhmmmm. Did you learn anything new?
N: We read the Mitten and did the letter J and then at recess I farted and my bum exploded.
Me: Super. You’ll have to tell Grandma you read a Jann Brett book.
N: Wanna hear a joke?
Me: Sure.
N: Knock, knock.
Me: Who’s there?
N: Butt.
Me: (rolling my eyes) Butt who?
N: Stinky butt at the door hahahahahah! Get it! Butt at the door? Oh, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum and a butt butt butt butt butt.
Me: Can we talk about something other than butts?
N: How about bums?
Me: Or bums or anything to do with your rear end? Or toilets or anything else that is gross.
N: silent
Me: Hello? Did you fall asleep?
N: I just don’t have anything else to say now.